Video: shit cyclists say

Two including the snot rocket. In my defence I only used "car back" in a US sportive.

Without a lie - just the one about losing weight to ride. It's very American. No one I know says 'suck' just as I'd be queasy if anyone called me 'buddy'. I don't say 'suck'. I'm not interested in carbon and I don't snot rocket - of it would end up down me. We need a British version of this which could instead include these from older club members I know. Imagine these in a Lancashire accent:

"All well and good but try doing that with a number on your back..."

"Your saddles too high/ too low / too far forward / too far back."

"That's not steel it' s aluminium."
(clack of wheel magnet sticking to top tube)
".....Mmmm.. It might be steel..."

"Get on the rivet!"

10 miles into a short fast training run. "Can we stop for a coffee?"

"Get on my wheel"

"I've been doing two hours a night on the turbo in the kitchen"

"Put your chamois cream on before your deep heat"

"Aye, aye. Here they come -The Big Hitters!"

"What's 'Ti' stand for? Tin?"

"I don't use factory built wheels"

"I've did the the Tourmalet when I was your age. But I was on a 42/23..."

" Is that an original Eddy Merckx frame? They made two sorts: a good one and a crap one.....You've got the crap one."

Bloody hell MercuryOne, you've nailed my father there. Only when he rode the Tourmalet, he was riding his old fixed gear TT bike - proper British steel that was, and it was 54/12, and the hill used to be about 25%.

Hmm four at most, thank goodness

11. Damn. Oh well, in good company

Oh dear 33.

23!! Crickey!

Only the snot one. But not in company or on video.

Apart from "Do you have any money I can borrow?", I can honestly say I've never said a single one of those things. My bike probably weighs 50lbs with all the junk I have attached to it, and it's all steel. My 'sprinting speed' is about 10mph, LOL.

That snot thing is disgusting, I can't believe that so many people do it, just carry a handkerchief in one of your pockets.

Rank

That snot thing is disgusting, I can't believe that so many people do it, just carry a handkerchief in one of your pockets.

Rank

That snot thing is disgusting, I can't believe that so many people do it, just carry a handkerchief in one of your pockets.

Rank

That's weird, it posted three times

That's weird, it posted three times

Every single damn one of them...Every one.....

And I have 25+ more I could add...

Oh no, 29, including every single one starting with "can I borrow..."

Just one 'I'm not a climber' (though I'm not a sprinter either). Though I do clear my nose if there's no-one around (and carry a hanky as well if there is!) The problem is that I always cycle alone so don't have anyone to talk to. Everyone 'aaaahhh'....

..... ?

No.. ok then.

over 28! ... funny video!

2 including snot rocket!!! not to bad at all

.........do you really want to know........seriously...........I don't know if this is good or bad..................ok here goes.................45...........need I say anymore.............yes I am glad to say that I don't do the snot thing though!!!!!

The video was hilarious! I counted and saw myself doing 6 of those. I can't believe I did so many of those stereotypical things without me noticing. I hope they can do more of such videos. I am sure there are more things that we cyclists do that they have not featured.

Nice snot rocket, especially in the shop...

A dodgy 4 without the snot, which I only do when riding on my own, or with mates . . .
OK, 5, maybe 6 then.

21.....

Oh crap I got 36 and I'm not even American!

Gulp! I lost count

Errr,

I am guilty of the snot rocket (only when cycling/running, and never in polite society), does muttering it to yourself on a solo ride count? If so then:

Man this head wind sucks (or words to that effect)
also the bike weight arms race im currently engaging in with my boss/occasional training partner

snot and can I borrow some money?
But then I'm not a proper cyclist.
Although I do say "you could lift his bike with 1 finger" quite a lot!